Elements

This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all, even if they are a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of all its furniture, still treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.

-Rumi
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Sometimes I feel like the Wind
"Don't I need roots?"
or do I run like Fire?
glide like Water..."
Then a flower Blossoms
"Oh, I've been Soil all along."


But Soil not even am I!!!!!!!!!

I've been asking many question / witnessing many things within myself / perceiving much outside of me and wondering "what is this a reflection of?"

What are my Ideas? Something is not serving me. I've seen I am afraid to both laugh and cry. Now I am Strong enough to Fly.

"Love encompasses all things," I write. Yet why am I not a "drunk laughing niussance?"* Some moments I forget that I am the Divine.

So I'm trying to remember my feet walk on Paradise with every step. My Heart fills with energy for the Beauty it takes in, the Wonder it has to express.

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Some notes I took white listening to tracks from "The Scent of Light" being played on KKCR (Kaua'i Community Radio, a beautiful gift on one passing Sunday):

Do you know how beautiful you are?
Speaking of God = a PARADE, a Wonder of Sounds
Sing to God!!! = GRATITUDE

Only Love can lift the Heart up so high

I am Happy, even before I have a reason

THE BODY WILL AGAIN BECOME RESTLESS
UNTIL YOUR SOUL PAINTS ALL ITS BEAUTY UPON THE SKY

-Pure Wisdom from Hafiz
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I am a spark of light, thinking it is lost in the sea of grey.
Time with Mother Earth/Holy Spirit teaches me....

I wrote things in a notebook these passing days in Koke'e:

You want to start at the Beginning, but the beginning is everywhere; the beginning is in everything.

The Rainbows appear: Smiles from the Earth. Smile so Bright and Radiating it stirs Deep Joy and Celebration.
Butterflies come by to say "how lovely you have come to play. The wind is gentle here and the air is fragrant." Love permeates each scent, each Stone.


Relationships that Lift You Up:
mirror back Gratutude for your Unique Beauty, Energy, Perspective, Expression, Movements, Vibrations /
See you as Divine Incarnation

The more you open and let-go, the more Magic you will receive.

The Universe will Deliver/Create a gift more magnificent than anything your mind can conceive.

Surrender it all to Source

Darkness/Density is that which has not been touched by the Light, that which has not been awoken through movement/vibration

REALITY IS THIS MOMENT ONLY
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feet fusing into the holy lava flow of Divine Perfection in this, the one and only, NOW

Love,
Kayleigh

Sunshine
Ocean Rocks
Rainbows
Magic Land




*Blame keeps the sad game going.
It keeps stealing all your wealth.
Giving it to an imbecile with no financial skills.
Dear one, Wise Up.
When the violin can forgive the past It starts singing.
When the violin can stop worrying about the future
You will become such a drunk laughing nuisance
That God will then lean down and start combing you into His hair.
When the violin can forgive every wound caused by others
The heart starts singing.

Hafiz

Another mystery

How did we live for so long without Chia in our diets? I mean, could that even be considered living at all?? Superfood of the Aztecs, come on!!!

I don't mind if I die

I don't mind if I die.
body collapsing into the Earth
skin, muscles, bones    open, fall apart.
Like cottonwood seeds conducted by the wind
floating  floating  floating  into nothing
 falling    falling    falling   into everything
Matter bows down to her Queen
the all Holy Origin of life
our Mother Earth
infused with Star Spirit to birth
Truth and Love combined
in me, I live on forever.
But this body, I give it back.
It is not mine. It is not me.
There is no Kayleigh
only consciousness coalescing with matter to
    sing run jump and Live the Glories of Awareness of Life
no fears no strife
A simple perfection to be seen
and when its done, I give it back, knowing it was never mine-
only a gift to explore the Divine
If I see it is not me, then I see me:
Spirit. Eternal. Radiating. Perfect. Forever.

Questions from Spirit

How is it possible to fail? Are you not already here? Do you not exist? Is there not complete glory in your very existence? What is missing?
You will be more complete when you lose that weight?
You will be more complete when you read that book?
You will be more complete when you meet that person?
You will be more complete when you visit that place?
You will be more complete when you have that thing?
You will be more complete when you do that faster?
No. You are already complete. Nothing can be added.
What you are missing is Consciousness. Awareness of your wholeness. You are already complete. Nothing can be added to your existence. You need merely to be aware of the fullness of what you already are. When your consciousness opens to include all things, to see all angles, then you experience your wholeness. To know you are all colors, all expressions, all possibilities. This is what is needed.

"Vertebrae by Vertebrae" - Bjork, from Volta

Vertebrae by Vertebrae - YouTube

I was drawn to this song recently, perhaps because of its intimate relationship to "Pluto." Like "Pluto," it explores the tension between True Self and False Self, but in more depth. Whereas "Pluto" is built up momentum culminating in the explosion of all false sense of reality, "Vertebrae by Vertebrae" explores the constriction we feel when we are trapped in the limitations of Ego.

The wind and crashing waves invoke an ocean cliff. "Up on the toe" stands a character with a desperate desire. She desires the perspective and guidance of the True Self. She is there looking out with her "spine straight and erect." This is the yogi, the seeker. I associate the imagery of the spine with the practice of meditation. One of the essential techniques for most meditative practices is to have the spine straight and erect. This allows for an ease of movement between the chakras and other energy systems of the body; it is an essential element in achieving the goal of meditation: union of all of the different energies, open, free-flowing communication. Wholeness. Harmony. Unity within and without.

The seeker stands on the toe, "hungry and curious." She has desire - the hunger to know Self, to be aligned. And she is curious. This is key! It means she is open. No knowledge, no understanding, nothing will come unless you are open. If you are up on the toe with a closed mind, thinking you have all of the answers, thinking there is no mystery, then you will not receive. If you are seeking the True Self, then will, desire, openness and humility are always required of you. She is there, hungry and curious, looking forward to....the explosion of her body, perhaps?

Then there is a second character: a beast on four legs. This to me is the False Self. I would definitely make a distinction here of a bestial identity vs. an animal identity. Animals do not live in a self-imposed dysfunction. They do not live all moments of their consciousness in fear, stress, or anxiety. They do not worry about there not being enough, they do not wonder if they've made mistakes, they do not harbor anger, resentment, pain, sadness. They are present to the moment - trusting, authentic, harmonious. The beast, on the other hand, is insatiable, voracious. Always wanting more. To a beast, all things are an enemy, all moments are discontented. The beast self is trapped, it does not have access to the infinite possibility birthed from relaxation, divine union, connection. Humans as animals are not predestined to live a bestial existence. In fact, if we were more consciously connected to the actual animal experience, it would help us achieve more balance within physical matter. When we deny all things, when we move through life with any form of resistance, this is the beast self - the structure we become imprisoned by as we search for our freedom.

Bjork now explains that the character "came here to lose face. Got down on her knees." Here I see surrender. Again, great humility which was earlier coupled with the seeker's curiosity. But this surrender, which is a very very high thing, is now associated with identification with the beast figure. This juxtaposition perhaps speaks to the journey we find ourselves on as Spirit. Spirit is eternal. It moves in and out of material existence, but has no end or beginning. Entering into material existence, we forget our origin in spirit. Our truth is covered by the material existence, and as our attention shifts to the dense matter we find ourselves in, we become ignorant of our eternal and unconditional grounding in Spirit. This act of entering the material is humbling - we eat, shit, pee, fuck. We enter the realm of the animal, a realm where we risk identification with the beast. In this act of surrender, we accept the limitations of the animal identity (physical form), in order to experience ourselves as Divine creators (with spine straight and erect).

Exploring the infinite depths of our Selves, as the seeker does, brings many challenges. It seems we are continually swallowed up by our bestial identifications. We lose trust in ourselves and in the process of life itself. Without the consciousness of our true natures and true identities, we feel as though the weight of the earth is on us. In the song the experience is described as being "filled with steam." It builds, it feels tight, heavy, constricted, ready to explode. It is a very stark contrast to the feeling of being Brand New, which was achieved in "Pluto." Here, Bjork brings the feeling of being trapped in limitations and fears into focus.

"same old cloud, claustrophobic me" the seeker admits, consumed by bestial pressures. I find easy association of this line with an Osho Zen Tarot card I draw far too often. The card represents the Page of Clouds (traditionally the suit of Swords). It is titled "Mind." It reads, "This is what happens when we forget that the mind is meant to be a servant, and start to allow it to run our lives. The head is filled with mechanisms, the mouth is ranting and raving, and the whole surrounding atmosphere is being polluted by this factory of arguments and opinions." Osho explains, "...you will be surprised what goes on inside your mind. It remains in the background, it is constantly there, it surrounds you like a cloud. With this cloud you cannot know reality; you cannot attain to spiritual perception." The seeker feels the pain of this claustrophobia. "Let it burst like old train sounds" is the plea. "Make them leave me, nature." Is she asking? Can we call on the great Mother Earth to relieve our pain? To enter us and free us of the beast? I do and that shit works!! God damn the vocals after this line!!! amazing.

"My arms ooze out of my shoulders," a reminder that I am not a beast on four legs. Vertebrae by vertebrae I stand, straighten my spine, my arms ooze out of my shoulders and I am a human angel. I pray, "please release this pressure off me. release. Let off some steam."

The seeker also sets "her clock to the moon." This stands out very strongly to me. I recently learned about the 13 moon calendar, a "biologically accurate solar-lunar calendar." The 13 moon calendar corresponds to a measurement of time that aligns with the earth's movement in relation to the solar system's movement (and beyond), as opposed to the 12 month calendar which arbitrarily divides days within the a solar year. Setting one's clock to the moon, in a very literal sense, would mean to use the 13 moon natural time calendar (see 13 Moon Natural Time Calendar for more info). I have found the calendar to be an unfathomably useful tool in creating harmony within the self and between the self and outer world.

If you seek, set your clock to the moon. Extend your spine and listen with hungry curiosity. But beware, "the air is thinner here." Be gentle with yourself on this journey. Take your time, rest, reflect, integrate. and on and on.

You must listen to this song if you haven't already. The lyrics follow:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZvEcjUKXR0

up-on-the-toe
is a view
up-on-the-toe
and the spine straight and erect
hungry and curious
up-on-the-toe
looking forward to

...the air is thinner here...

she came here to lose face
got down on her knees
the beast is back
on 4 legs
set her clock to the moon
raises her spine
vertebrae by vertebrae
up-on-the-toe
looking...

I have been filled with steam
for months for years
same old cloud, claustrophobic me
let it burst like old train sounds
make them leave me, nature

vertebrae by vertebrae by vertebrae
by vertebrae by vertebrae

my arms ooze out of my shoulders
and the arms ooze out of my shoulders
I curl my tail inwards, inwards
set my clock to the moon
vertebrae by vertebrae

please release this pressure off me
please release this pressure off me
please. this pressure off me. release.

let off some steam

up-on-the-toe

same old cloud, claustrophobic me

and the spine straight and erect

hungry and curious

looking forward to...

"Pluto" by Bjork

Excuse me
but I just have to
explode
explode this body
off me

I'll be brand new
brand new tomorrow
a little bit tired
but brand new


There are days when I wake up refreshed. My eyes open and they feel beauty. It does not matter what they see, they just filter in beauty. The air has power. It fills me with energy and promise of joy for the day ahead. It is waking up with a feeling of spaciousness - there is room all around me. It is the spaciousness that brings delight. A citrus curiosity for what's to come. Lively living. The space is freedom. Freedom to Be. Freedom to express. This is Life. I wake up and delight at the opportunity to explore and express.

Other days I wake up tired. Still feeling the weight from the day before, I open my eyes and I am in a room - doesn't matter where - but the spaciousness is not there. It is more like the feeling of waking up in a hamster cage. I get up and I feel heavy, slow. Everything feels heavy. Monotone. There is no freshness. I have forgotten how much excitement there is in me, how much genius, how much newness. I have forgotten the truth that opens me up to the spaciousness.

There is something I frequently forget about time: it only exists RIGHT NOW. Right now has never happened before. Right now well never happen again. Right now is the only thing that exists is this moment in time. In this understanding, nothing else beyond this moment is real, therefore has no basis in reality. There is no such thing as Kayleigh from yesterday or Kayleigh in 5 months. There is only Here, Now.
When this perspective gets buried under my shoulda, woulda, coulda's and couldn'ts, cant's and other cantankerous mind chatter, life no longer feels expansive and abundant. It then feels limited.

This is where Bjork comes in: in the moment of remembrance; in the (re)realization that I am more than my past, more than my fantasized future, more than my thoughts, more than what I see. "Excuse me, but I just have to explode this body." The body is not what I am. The junk of limitations are not what I am. I am Infinite. I am Free. I am a glorious expression of all that is ME. Of course. Once you explode your body, once you become Present and enter the here and now, you'll be "brand new." Then you feel your freshness. It is the experience of rebirth everyday. Can you comprehend the exhilaration of rebirth everyday? My god. A cascade of newness. Gusts of mystery, the winds of the unknown. In a trusting spirit this is the tantalizing aphrodisiac of life: opportunity. Opportunity for anything! Then everything is brand new. Everything around you takes on the fresh quality. You are no longer bound by the confines of your limitations. You may wake up to do the same thing everyday, but you are no less brand new, no less free, no less mysterious. You are still there, infinite potential, infinite opportunity for new experience.

All you have to do is explode your body. This is the act of entering Presence. Leave everything behind. The body as metaphor for our historical and fictional vehicle of our mind; the suitcases we fill with our memories and expectations. All the limitations we pack with us on this journey through life. The things that weigh us down, that create constriction, that turn living into surviving. When you explode out of all of these things, you are brand new. And what can be said of something that is brand new? Not very much. It has to be experienced first. Experience this moment in its fullness, without limitations, without expectations.

This process is invigorating when it happens. It seems as though things could not be any other way. But then without notice, I realize I've been waking up in the monotony of my movements again. This is, perhaps, where more care and attention are needed. The experience of being brand new is still something I am learning to consciously direct - to remember to explode my body. Bjork speaks of being "a little bit tired" after this process. While I experience Presence as the invigorating breath of life, this line reminds me of the ebb and flow of experience. The Yin and Yang. The Masculine and Feminine. I seem to get caught up in the renewed sense of excitement of the mystery and opportunity of living, that it doesn't take long to crash afterwards. This is certainly a place that requires more of my attention. Stillness. Rest. Reflection. Rejuvenation. It is important to honor and listen to the continual cycle of the process of rebirth. We experience the explosive joy of being brand new, and then we rest and integrate the depths that we were able to explore in this openness. Thanks, Bjork, for reminding me.

Why Babies are Magical

Babies are magical because we connect so easily to their Love, their Essence. A baby does not keep the door to its Love locked. Whosoever desires may enter and immediately is showered with Love. A baby does not know itself as its body, does not perceive separation. A baby is a more clear reminder that "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a human experience" (Pierre Teilhard de Chardin). Perhaps we are not conscious of this, and that is why the baby is magic. When with a baby, there is no need of this knowledge, no need of conscious affirmation of this understanding. We FEEL it. We hold the baby and we know we are holding perfection. We know we are holding something Divine.

Babies are magical because they allow us to enter the land beyond expectations and judgments. With a baby, we naturally celebrate ALL that it is. Love pours from our cells, flows from our glances and we are caught showering the baby with Love. Unlike in our other adult relationships (or even with Children), where we apply many conditions to the act of giving love, babies beckon us to do it freely. This is freedom: to Love without condition.

We see the baby and are overcome by the magnificence of creation and existence. But what are we celebrating? If it were the matter itself, we would get the same sensation from any material object. But although the baby resides in a divine temple that is its body, it is not only the temple we admire and love; it is the indwelling consciousness, the spirit of Life. We see it, in its full potential. We look at the baby and know anything is possible. It is a celebration of Life.

And what allows us to be so open with the baby. Because the baby is still identified with its Essence. We know it carries no judgments, no static presuppositions about us. The baby is open to receive all. A baby does not care about the size of our nose, the state of our teeth, the clothes that we wear or the cut of our hair. The baby shows up with a heart fully open to receive. The baby offers love unconditionally to us, as we are able to offer it to the baby.

A baby distributes delight. How? Because a baby delights in all things. As a conscious understanding we know this is possible because God is in all things, God is all things. So the undiluted/unconditioned response to all things can only be delight - a joyful celebration of Spirit's manifestation in the world of things. This is a baby's smile.

Babies are fearless. They explore the unknown in their every movement and every glance. They experience the mystery of living, which is the truth of experience. The Truth is that it is always a mystery. The baby loves us fearlessly. A baby isn't worried about what it is wearing. It doesn't do anything special to attract your love. It fearlessly receives and accepts all things. It lays gleefully as you wipe its butt clean, laughing, giggling in its nude vulnerability. Imagine such freedom. A baby is not deciding what to love and how to be loved, the baby IS Love, knows this and lives it. Can we live Love too? Surely this is what we are here to do.

And so it is that babies are magical. It is also why they are the world's greatest teacher when we are open, humble and courageous enough to listen. They teach us what freedom really is.

Initial Teachings

The more I focus on my own healing, the more I encounter the myriad of ways to move closer to the wholeness and harmony we seek within ourselves and outside of ourselves. Books, classes, retreats, activities, exercises, meditations, programs, philosophies, communities - they all have something to contribute to the wayward journeyer on the path of Discovery.

Almost all of the guidance I have encountered has genuinely urged the seeker towards a more balanced life and a healthier, more peaceful perspective of reality. Yet despite all of my searching, studying, and growth I seem to walk into the same corners: anxiety, stress, restlessness, isolation, doubt. Luckily I am again and again reminded of my way. The message finds me and like a compass makes the path clear once again: the way of Love.

The purpose of self-help books, the purpose of spirituality, the purpose of healing, the purpose of New Age philosophy, the purpose of self-exploration, the purpose of metaphysical exercises, the purpose of all of the teachings I have come across all have the same goal: Love. But we have turned our attention away from Love. We have been focused on our fears, our doubts, our pain. If someone were to see us and just say "Love," it can be as helpful as if they had said "unicorn." Of course, if we are somewhat in touch with past experiences of love or if we are open to receiving love in that moment, we do get some sense of the directive to love. But the goal is Love 24/7 x infinity. This is a very big shift for most of us. So the teachings step in. Love, let's begin.

You find yourself in this body. It is a part of your material existence. Love it. Treat it well. Honor it. Allow complete love for all of its expression: your eyes, your nose, mouth, legs, the hairs on your chin, the curve in your back, the length of your toes, the fat on your thigh. Love it all.
Listen to it. What does it need? Give it those things. Feed it those foods that nurture it and make it feel strong, balanced. You will know what these are if you listen and pay attention. Fruits, vegetables, whole grains, nuts, seeds. Food from the Earth.
Move your body. Nature is in a constant state of movement. Your body is a part of this dance. Move it. Notice how it feels. Its energy wants to express, flow, shift, change. Listen to what it needs. Use your body. Move your body in any way that fits your desire: sex, walking, skipping, jumping, climbing, swimming, swaying, ballet-ing, balancing, stretching, dancing, hugging, massaging, rolling, bowling. Move it as much as you can. It will tell you what it needs.

Your mind - silence it. Reality exists only in this moment. If you have traveled to the past or future, you may be avoiding the present reality. Silence the mind and access what is waiting to be seen and heard underneath the chatter and time-travel. You might find: a body that wants to move, a memory that wants to be released, pain that wants forgiveness, a dream that wants attention, a longing that wants to be expressed, exhaustion that wants some rest.
Silence the mind in order to access the Present. There you will discover your next step: the authentic request you are asking of yourself when you are not drowning in the fearful chatter of your mind. Whatever you meet in your mind, whatever you access when your mind is still and spacious and silent, OFFER IT LOVE. Meet it with Love. Only Love. Bring nothing but Love.

You are spirit. YOu have felt it. You have felt it in joy, in laughter, in acceptance, in forgiveness, in release, in gratitude, in nature, in your body, in another, in the stars, in a leaf, in a taste, in silence, in stillness. This peace, this joy, this acceptance, it is Spirit. You have felt it. Perhaps not for a long time, not since childhood; perhaps yesterday; perhaps today. This is you. This is your eternal self. This is what is there ready to express at all moments if you allow it. Joy in all moments, acceptance in all moments, peace in all moments, beauty in all moments, spaciousness in all moments. This is Spirit. Spirit is always there.

Why? Why all of this? For Love. Love is what you are. Love is all things. Love is the beginning. Love is the end. Love is everything in between. When it seems there is no love, it is because we have forgotten. We have believed ourselves something incomplete. We have forgotten that we are Love. So we get lost. We think something is missing; we think there is something else we need; we think there is danger; we think there are mistakes; we think some things are bad; we think some things are wrong; we think something is limited; we think there won't be enough; we think there is an end. That's why there are these books/teachings/guides. TO REMIND US. To remind us of what we know. The problem I encounter is that I forget the "why," the Love part. I know the many components of honoring my True Self, but then I get lost in the process. Judgments enter. Fear enters. I am left perplexed, "I know the tools, why do I still feel disconnected?" Because I have forgotten the "why." I have forgotten the Love. I have turned the process into a goal. I have turned the tools into a machine. I have forgotten the Truth. I have forgotten Love. As we move toward our wholeness, we must never forget what it is all for. We must always come back to Love. Always. This must be a priority. You must find a way to remember this one thing only. Then everything else carries you towards it. Then everything is only a reminder that Love is here now. Love is all there is. Live it.

With Love,
Kayleigh

Beauty

Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?

You are God manifest. You are the physical embodiment of heaven, of the divine. All forms are the physical embodiment of the Divine.
You look at a flower and see its beauty. A landscape takes your breath away. A sunrise mesmerizes you with its perfection. How can you think yourelf any different? Are you not a creation of the Earth? Have you not equal composition? Were you not formed from the same source as a butterfly? What are your cells composed of?

The imperfection you see is a sickness of your mind. Beauty is all things. Find something that is not beautiful. What makes it so? Who determines this final evaluation? Do you decide who is speaking when imperfection threatens your peace? It is not you who sees imperfection. You are a messanger of love. You speak kindness. Love is all that you are. Ignorance (the perception of separateness, of disconnection from the divine) is what sees imperfection. For all is Divine. There is no thing you can sit with, no thing you can focus your attention on and not connect with its beauty. Its mere existence makes it beautiful. a rock. a cloud. a leaf. a stone. a child. hair. eyes. mountains. a table. a car. a seed. a plant. a plane. YOU. It cannot be otherwise and you know this is so.
Do not consider it. Feel it. Live it. Experience it.

The ignorance of your mind wants to remain separate from all that is, so it creates imperfection. This is the source of its control. It keeps you searching. Perfection is here, now. When you are open to it, when you allow yourself to experience it, all imperfections dissolve into truth, beauty, love. All is one.

The Art of Leaving

When I wrote this I had recently broken up with someone I knew but a short while, though still cared deeply about.

The Art of Leaving begins with intuition. It is not within my scope to move into this intimate and profound topic here, but luckily I don't need to. Some people wince or scoff at the idea of "intuition." When approached as a topic, they place it disdainfully within the mists of fictional lands, fearful to stay too long lest menacing dwarfs cast spells on them. To say these same people do not follow their intuition either consciously or unconsciously, however, would be a fat stack of baloney.

It has many names: Inner Wisdom, gut feeling, intuitive perception, Knowing, spirit, guiding truth, etc. Most people know it as "I have no idea why I did that, but I'm sure as hell glad I did." Or "what have I done? How did this happen?" when they didn't listen to the inner direction. This is where it all begins: with that voice, that feeling, that premonition. It gently speaks, opening a new path. "This is not it," it tells you. Then: terror, confusion, disbelief, denial, sadness. In essence, FEAR emerges. To the extent that we trust our intuition, our movement is swift and deliberate. We follow this voice and are at peace. When we are out of touch with it, our movement is heavy, awkward, cumbersome. So how do we move with the flow? Trust your intuition and explore your fears.

Relationships are beautiful expressions of the Union we seek as individuals. Relationship means Giving and Receiving. It is like your birthday everyday! or it is a battlefield if the relationship is imbalanced. When a relationship ends it is like experiencing a death. What will I receive now? To whom will I give? who will see me? What will happen to my supply? Fear. We are scared that the person we are with is the source of what we treasure in them. The unified part in us knows this not to be true. Love is infinite; it comes from infinite sources. Connection is ubiquitous. Intimacy is omnipresent.

The voice tells us to move on not to cut us off from these things, but to lead us to a greater supply - to open us to a deeper alignment. This really throws the ego off. We are either dumbfounded because we truly love and value the other person, or we are so in denial that we must demonize them in order to let go. Without trust, leaving becomes an impossible feat.

The art of leaving is not about measurements, it is not about deficiencies or imperfections in the other person. It is about expansion. The person I broke up with was a phenomenal human being. He was authentic, carried a deep respect for those around him, was mature, self-reflective and aware. The breakup had nothing to do with him and everything to do with how I fit into the equation of "us." there is nothing to be said of why I no longer wanted to pursue a deepening of our relationship except that the Inner Sense directed me towards a different path. The ego cannot comprehend this. "If the other is perfect, why is it over?" it asks. The question should be, "if it is over, what will come next?" The answer is: something more profound, more intimate, more beautiful. Trust this. It can only be but so. It is evolution.

So what does it take? Listening. Trusting. Affirming a higher good. Begone with the cynicism, fear and dispair! Rejoice in what is to come. Of course there is a process of mourning, but look into this deeper. I found that my mourning was rooted in a deep gratitude. Gratitude to have had this person in my life, to have shared, to have learned, to have loved. Often, the grief and sadness that we feel are partially rooted in cynicism, hopelessness and a distrust for the perfect unfolding of the future. It comes from a belief that there is not more beauty and love to come. It is your choice which to believe.

The Art of Leaving is truly a celebration. A celebration of what was and of what is to be.

Let it flow, just let go.
Trust. Fall. Fly.

If you need more encouragement, just look to Toni Braxton:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nWGDY_ND70

All is Full of Love

I first directly associated Bjork's music with a spiritual worldview while studying Bhakti Yoga in India in 2010. Listening to "Hidden Place" from Vespertine created vivid imagery of the divine couple, Radha and Krishna, secretly meeting in the spring forest for an intimate rendezvous. It was then that I began to interpret almost all of her music through the lens of what I was learning and experiencing in the practice of Awareness.

Bjork's music inspires and uplifts me. It offers love, wisdom, encouragement. I would like to write spirited responses to various songs as a way to focus on what has been meaningful and helpful in my development. Huzzah!

I decided to start with a song that in some ways is the most difficult of all. "All is Full of Love" is the last song on Bjork's fourth studio album.


"All is full of love." This realization seems to encompass all other truths that lead to peace and fulfillment. All is Full of Love. Love permeates all things. Love is everywhere. There is no place that love is not. It is a pretty concept and our fear-based egos want it to remain just that: a concept.

All is full of love is not just a concept. It is a lived reality. It is an experience that is always available to us whenever we open ourselves to it. Love is all there is. In a field of flowers: love. In your warm bed: love. In a delicious breakfast: love. Spending time with friends: love. Watching a sunset: love. In the middle of war: love. The beginning of a breakup: love. The loss of a loved one: love.

Our minds think they have a handle on all things. Without our conscious awareness they label and judge everything around us. They like us to believe that there are some places where there is not love. This act creates separation, isolation, fragmentation. We think we get to decide what is good and what is bad. In this model, we're not even really concerned about love. We still think it exists, but only in places we determine to be good. Everything else is seen as bad, evil. Love does not exist in those places.

All is Full of Love is the ultimate surrender. Surrender to everything. All is love. You do not decide. All is love.

"You'll be given love." There is nothing you can do to break the constant flow of love to you. There is nothing you can do to separate yourself from love. Love is an unconditional presence, not dependent on any external condition. You'll be given love - always, despite anything. You don't have to do anything, you don't have to stop doing anything, you don't have to have anything, you don't have to give up anything. You'll be given love. At all times, you are given love.

You'll be taken care of." When you surrender yourself to love, to the place beyond good & bad, beyond effort & control, you reside in a place of care. You don't have to try and protect yourself; you don't have to save yourself; you don't have to fight for security. All is full of love; you'll be taken care of - always, without condition.

"You'll be given love. YOU HAVE TO TRUST IT." I've realized that trust can be a vague word. How do you trust? what does that mean? what does it look like? To trust means to say "yes," to have Faith. It starts with a risk - Faith. You are unsure of the outcome. You must trust and have courage. You say Yes. You trust and say yes. Then what you once had faith in becomes an experience. It is no longer faith. You said yes and experienced the truth. This is essential. You can spend your whole life doubting and mentally calculating where you have seen love and where you haven't. You are not allowing yourself openness to what is always there. When you trust and say yes, only then do you live the experience of all being full of love.

.....to be continued.....